CROSSFIRE: The Right Way to Eat Cereal
Milk Before Cereal, but Do What You Want, It’s All Delicious
By Dae Borg
This afternoon, I prepared a bowl of cereal: Milk first, cereal second, just like always. The act of making cereal has always seemed so simple to me that I never really thought that you could do it the “wrong way.” It’s true. Most people pour the cereal before the milk, but there are a few of us who like to put the milk in first, and we shouldn’t be judged so harshly for doing so. You may call me a “menace to society,” claim that it “just doesn’t make sense,” or say that I “can’t be trusted,” but you should at least hear what I have to say before you decide that pouring milk in first is completely absurd. And who knows? Maybe you’ll switch to pouring milk first too after you read why people like myself do it.
It’s a relatively popular opinion that soggy cereal is unenjoyable. One of the best ways to prevent this is by pouring the milk first! Yes, the cereal will float to the top, but you can easily just push it down with your spoon and get just the right amount of milk on it, all without transforming the cereal into a mushy mess. Moreover, if pouring the cereal in after the milk results in too much cereal to push down, I recommend adding in small amounts of cereal at a time, until you’re satisfied. That way, you have complete control and can enjoy it without having to worry about anything. On the contrary, when you pour the cereal first, the cereal is going to linger in the milk for far too long, creating a very unenjoyable experience for the last bites of your breakfast. It may be argued that it won’t get soggy if you eat it at a faster pace, however, slow eaters, such as myself, should have an easy alternative without being ridiculed for it.
On top of that, pouring milk first gives the breakfast-maker a better milk-to-cereal ratio. When people pour cereal in first, they often don’t know how much milk they are actually pouring in, and are left with a puddle of leftover milk, which a lot of people end up pouring down the drain. To prevent this unnecessary waste, pour however much milk you want in first, and then put the cereal on top of it! You will have a perfect amount of milk leftover, which is deliciously sweet (if you choose sugary cereal) and fulfilling, and provides you with the flawless ending to your breakfast eating experience.
No matter which way you choose to make cereal, don’t put all your hate into commenting about what other people do. There are better things to do with your life.
Cereal Before Milk: the Key to Happiness
By Nicole Pinto
My heart pounded, sensing an evil washing through the room: a thin layer of Lucky Charms was dropped over a pool of milk already settled in the bowl. I watched in horror as the spoon attempted to break through the pile of Charms, but instead sent pieces flying across the table. Preparing cereal is a mundane task that we overlook everyday. While seemingly pointless, one simple change can mean the difference between great efficiency and a stressful waste of time—let me tell you why.
The main argument I hear in favor of milk first is that people prefer to preserve the cereal’s crispiness, but putting milk second does not necessarily equate to soggy cereal. The goal of pouring the liquid second is to thoroughly coat each and every flake, and it only gets unbearably soggy if you eat it at an unreasonably slow speed. And yes, while putting cereal second might not have as much sogginess, the layer of cereal in direct contact with the pool of milk is constantly absorbing more liquid whilst waiting for its turn to be consumed, therefore making it mushier. If you fancy the crispiness so much, might I suggest eating it straight out of the box?
One of the biggest lies is that pouring the milk first provides a better cereal to milk ratio. Without the cereal to guide you, the amount of milk can’t complement its crunchy counterpart. If you pour too much then you can’t put a decent amount of cereal to balance it out because you would then risk an overflow when dunking your spoon. So no, putting milk first is not a good cereal to milk ratio—that’s just what they want you to think. In fact, by putting the cereal first, it acts as a guide for your milk pouring: once the liquid starts to barely appear over the crunchy pile you know when to stop pouring, resulting in a closer ratio. Why take the risky, inefficient path when you could enjoy your meal worry-free?
While it is near impossible to completely end up with no excess milk from either process, at least with putting the cereal first, the milk has absorbed more of the sugary goodness from its solid counterpart. Leftover milk is nothing less than a glorious surprise that provides you with two options of either drinking the sweet milk or giving yourself another helping of cereal (the only time where putting cereal second is valid). Fun fact, this has also inspired a cereal milk flavor ice cream!
If cereal was meant to be in second place, why does the billion dollar company Kellogg, advertise “Snap. Crackle. Pop.”? This promise can only be fully achieved with no effort if the milk, aka the catalyst for the popping explosion, is second. If cereal was meant to be in second place, then why does wikiHow, the source for all ‘hows’, have a step by step with cereal hitting the bowl first? Take my words and see for yourself the fulfilling truth: eating cereal the correct way is key to the perfect day (you may even start unintentionally rhyming like me!). Let me pull you out of the dark side to embrace the bright rays of light, where we forgive, but never forget.
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Nicole Pinto (bean) loves daydreaming. In her free time she likes to do art, run, watch anime, and learn ASL. The most important thing she lives by is:...
(She/her)
Dae Borg is a senior who has a love for the Earth, wildlife, the arts, and meeting new people. She enjoys writing about global environmental...