The Student News Site of Enloe Magnet High School

Enloe Eagle's Eye

The Student News Site of Enloe Magnet High School

Enloe Eagle's Eye

The Student News Site of Enloe Magnet High School

Enloe Eagle's Eye

How to have a Gilmore Girls Fall

How to have a Gilmore Girls Fall

Sophia Stewart, Opinion Editor October 3, 2022

We have officially entered Gilmore Girls Fall. Gilmore Girls is the show of fall-lovers. It tells the story of a young single mom, Lorelai, and her daughter, Rory. This year, specifically, there’s been...

Maybe We Should Worry, Darling…

Maybe We Should Worry, Darling…

Jonah Yinger, Nora Gillett, and Chloe Yuastella September 29, 2022

Disclaimer: This is satire!! In no way are we criticizing Harry Styles’ character or personality. We are writing as fans who are just a little off-put by his recent style choices. Dear Mr. Styles,  We...

Bernie Sanders Overthrows the U.S. Government and Solves All World Problems

Bernie Sanders Overthrows the U.S. Government and Solves All World Problems

Akshat Yadav, Staff Writer June 2, 2022

Unexpected to most political analysts, Senator Bernie Sanders (IND-VT) launched a revolution overnight, and has taken over the White House and the U.S. Capitol building.   To accomplish this...

College Board Shuts Down, Effective Immediately

College Board Shuts Down, Effective Immediately

Olivia Metelo, News Editor May 3, 2022

College Board CEO David Coleman recently made the fatal mistake of searching ‘College Board’ on Twitter and faced a barrage of mean tweets from angsty teenagers who had fallen victim to the organization....

Eddie the Eagles Shocking ConfessioN(FT)

Eddie the Eagle’s Shocking ConfessioN(FT)

Crystal Leung, Graphic Designer & Publicist April 2, 2022

Eddie the Eagle, the beloved mascot of William G. Enloe High School, has a secret:   He’s an NFT.    “NFTs, or non-fungible tokens, are digital assets that don’t hold monetary...

Cookout Hours Change: No Longer a Lunch Option for Students

Cookout Hours Change: No Longer a Lunch Option for Students

Greene Rand, Sports Editor April 1, 2022

The wildly popular lunch location Cookout has released a statement changing the hours for the New Bern Avenue location from the opening time of 10:30am to 1:00pm. Cookout cited the change in hours...

Pixar Secedes from Disney Following Third Straight-to-Streaming Premiere

Pixar Secedes from Disney Following Third Straight-to-Streaming Premiere

Luxo Jr., Staff Writer April 1, 2022

Disclaimer: This is SATIRE. Everything in this article is false. Pixar is still a part of Disney and animators do in fact have social lives. Counter Disclaimer: Ok, so that last part might be a lie,...

Enloe Introduces 9 New Courses to Its Schedule

Enloe Introduces 9 New Courses to Its Schedule

Dae Borg, Malinn Welch, and Jonah Yinger April 1, 2022

In the wake of a groundbreaking decision to remove all semester-long classes from the Enloe schedule, our administrators have posted a few updates to the course list for the 2022-23 school year. For your...

The World Needs a New Al Capone, It’s Time

The World Needs a New Al Capone, It’s Time

Andrea Duca, Editor in Chief April 1, 2022

In an era where the selfish 1% socioeconomic class of billionaires have worshipping fanbases, it’s time to bring back a true debonair man of the people, a Robin-Hoodesque symbol if you will. He will...

NOTICE FROM THE ROYAL COURT: Satire in All of Its Forms Is Now Banished!

NOTICE FROM THE ROYAL COURT: Satire in All of Its Forms Is Now Banished!

Matthew Burkhart, News Editor April 1, 2022

Hear ye, hear ye, After many ages, the Enloe Eagle's Eye hath decided not to partake in April foolery this nigh. By royal decree of monopolist Char and Duchess Gwen, satire of all forms is now banished...

An It-Girl’s Guide for Not Embarrassing Yourself at School

An It-Girl’s Guide for Not Embarrassing Yourself at School <3

Maya Spencer, Graphic Designer and Publicist April 1, 2022

Hey girl-queen! High school can be totally difficult and harsh sometimes. But don’t fret, little eagle, we’ve got what you need to know to not just survive, but avoid all possible adolescent embarrassment. 1....

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