DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A SATIRE ARTICLE   PREFACE:    Written by Chief Publisher Dee F. Ine   It’s a well-known fact that Enloe students are busy. So busy, in fact, that...

There’s something in the air at Enloe right now. Faces are tense, friendships are ending, and the persistent sound of depressed shuffling fills the halls. Whispers float in the air, the voices of possessed...

To field questions intermittently between Dr. Jordan’s monthly Coffee Talks, the Enloe administration has launched a new message forum for truth-starved parents to fact check questionable statements...

“I’ve been getting home late every day for weeks, and I haven’t seen a dollar more in compensation,” complained Steve, a 36-year-old fire alarm working in Enloe’s West Gym Lobby.   Over...

Enloe’s new attendance policy is a complete hit with students! Starting this school year, senior exemptions are no longer senior exemptions! Now ALL Enloe Eagles are exempt from their teacher-made exams...

Meta, the parent company of Instagram, updated its user terms as well as many features within the app on Jan. 20 and then again on Apr. 3. These changes are permanent unless something happens in the next...

  It’s crunch time: APUSH binders and chemistry notebooks are filled to the brim, overflowing with notes on long-forgotten topics as students rush to cram a year’s worth of content back into...

Enloe Magnet High School is excited to announce the launch of the AP's first course dedicated entirely to Gen-Z slang: Yap AP, or “YAP” for short.   As a new form of communication, yapping has...

With the WL (Worldwide League) trade deadline nearing, teams are hastily moving to finalize deals and improve their position in the annual World playoffs. The largest deal of the deadline so far occurred...

It’s 1923, and you’re in your evening ball gown, being whisked away to have the night of your (teenage) life. As you step out of your horse-drawn carriage, bright lights flood your vision as you gaze...

Just in time for summer, many of Enloe’s most UV-challenged Eagles are getting the help they need from Enloe Take Action Now, or Enloe TAN. On April 1, you can drop off donations of sunscreen or contribute...

Disclaimer: This is a work of satire.   Studying: every high school student attempts it, but only a few succeed. If you’re one of the multitudes who wishes to improve your skills in this essential...